cyber

[Rattrap]

tekubus2002: hello
tekubus2002: are you nice girl
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Yes! A/S/L?
tekubus2002: hello
tekubus2002: i am not your age
tekubus2002: some older
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: That's ok!
tekubus2002: i am 28
tekubus2002: not too good for girl like you
tekubus2002: you are living in america
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Yes!
tekubus2002: i have visa for to come and stay
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Where do you live?
tekubus2002: i am now living in london
tekubus2002: but i am from africa my birth
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: So you are a black man?
tekubus2002: i have many place in my heart for night gorl like you
tekubus2002: i am brown
tekubus2002: of color
tekubus2002: but do not have ugly face as do some
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I am glad to hear that!
tekubus2002: it is ferturs they say
tekubus2002: some do not like the brown in the face
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Why not? Because it looks like poop?
tekubus2002: do you like ?
tekubus2002: some say cake some say poop
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I like it!
tekubus2002: i say cake
tekubus2002: ithink you are nice and special
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Thank you!
tekubus2002: for me to have as one day to be a wofe
tekubus2002: or maybe a nice friend
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Really? I would love to be your wife, if you are kind and gentle.
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: What would you do to win my love?
tekubus2002: what would you have me do my prince ?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Tell me!
tekubus2002: i would make you a bed of the roses and lay on you then
tekubus2002: so that you would feel pretty and warm
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: You would lay on me?
tekubus2002: ok
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Like a man-blanket?
tekubus2002: i said so ok
tekubus2002: yes
tekubus2002: a blanked made of from me
tekubus2002: you liek this concep ?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I do!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Would you be other types of furniture for me?
tekubus2002: if you had no furniture
tekubus2002: perhaps
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Would you be a sofa when I wanted to sit and watch TV?
tekubus2002: i do not make proper otomon
tekubus2002: if it please you to sit i will be stand for your pleasure
tekubus2002: as long as you become in love and happy for me
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: That would be lovely!
tekubus2002: i know this
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: If it was dark, would you be a lamp for me?
tekubus2002: i do not lisht from my body but perhaps if i had a light in my hand
tekubus2002: or a bulb
tekubus2002: i could make less darkness
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: If you put a bulb in your mouth...
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: And then an electrical cord up your ass.
tekubus2002: i have seen this work
tekubus2002: on the television
tekubus2002: maybe
tekubus2002: on the uncle fester i have seen
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Yes!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: So you could be a whole living room set of furniture for me!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: You have made me so happy.
tekubus2002: but i dio not know if this is something that is scientific
tekubus2002: i am glad you have become happy now
tekubus2002: when will we greet
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: You are coming in March?
tekubus2002: i have a apointment in new york in march i will maybe see you if you like me to be with you
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I am in California.
tekubus2002: its ok
tekubus2002: i can come there too
tekubus2002: from train goes there
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: If you come I want you to do something special for me.
tekubus2002: are you living with parents ?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Yes
tekubus2002: you can come out from the house to greeting at the train someday
tekubus2002: we can go exploring your country's side
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: What I want you to do is this:
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I want you to rent a hotel room.
tekubus2002: ok am listening
tekubus2002: go head
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: And I want you to be all the furniture in the hotel room.
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: And then we will make love.
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Do you understand?
tekubus2002: at one time ?
tekubus2002: yes i do
tekubus2002: but only one perhapos
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: No
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: It needs to be everything.
tekubus2002: and then become other and then other
tekubus2002: i am not so decorative i think
tekubus2002: but we will find a way
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I want to sit on you as a chair and watch TV - which is you pretending to be the TV - at the same time as you the refrigerator keeps my food cold.
tekubus2002: i want to try
tekubus2002: but i do not know scientist to keep cold
tekubus2002: but i have a warm body foor keeping your feet wart
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I think you can do anything!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: You seem so smart!
tekubus2002: and your vagina warm to the touch maybe
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Maybe!
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: So you and i would make love?
tekubus2002: i am so smart and you can learn from me as i teaching you things of that nature
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: okay!
tekubus2002: would you be able to appreciate this ?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: What would you teach me?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I have always had a fantasy about making love to a bedside table.
tekubus2002: we have many sexual customs in my country wich we find sex
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Tell me about some of them.
tekubus2002: do you have circumsised ?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Of course! You can buy furniture uncircumcised (natural) or circumcised (veneer).
tekubus2002: yes exactly
tekubus2002: we have one women who are not
tekubus2002: they are considered hrony
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Oh really?
tekubus2002: and we have ones that have this procedure
tekubus2002: and they are good wives
tekubus2002: not sluts
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Interesting
tekubus2002: it is not painful
tekubus2002: ony with one pinch only
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: So I should have that done?
tekubus2002: if you wish to become a good bride and sit with no regard
tekubus2002: yes !
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: If you act as all the furniture in a hotel room of love I will gladly let you cut the hell out of my cooter.
tekubus2002: this is a good measure
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Sounds fair.
tekubus2002: and you will love me more for this is my custom
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: But before you do, I want to use you as EVERY piece of furniture.
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I want you to be my ice machine.
tekubus2002: as such ?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I want you to be my closet.
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I want you to be my toilet.
tekubus2002: i do not know if i can become things like irioning board
tekubus2002: this becomes hot to the surface
tekubus2002: toilet?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Yes
tekubus2002: i think you might now want that
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I do!
tekubus2002: go to the bathroom on my body?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: IN your body.
tekubus2002: oh
tekubus2002: well ok so it is
tekubus2002: it is only one sacrifice for my love and nature
tekubus2002: what would you wna t to do with my penis ?
tekubus2002: as i am very stong in the penis
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Really!
tekubus2002: oh yes
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I would like your penis to be furniture too.
tekubus2002: how is this
tekubus2002: while it was elongate ?
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Either way...
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: When it is elongate I would like it to be a curtain rod.
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: And while it is flaccid I would like it to be a doorstop.
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: In the hotel room.
tekubus2002: it is useful in this manner
tekubus2002: as long as it can be it can be only many things
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: I understand!
tekubus2002: good
tekubus2002: it can not be some things
tekubus2002: but others yes
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: What can it not be?
tekubus2002: it cannot be a devining rod
tekubus2002: i have not had much success with finding water while it is elongate
tekubus2002: only if while i urinate in the direction of my face
a_m_b_e_r_4_e_v_e_r: Do you do that often?

[splice]

lol

[Rattrap]

Wellhung: Hello, Sweetheart. What do you look like?
Sweetheart: I am wearing a red silk blouse, a miniskirt and high heels. I work out every day, I'm toned and perfect. My measurements are 36-24-36. What do you look like?
Wellhung: I'm 6'3" and about 250 pounds.I wear glasses and I have on a pair of blue sweat pants I just bought from Walmart.I'm also wearing a T-shirt with a few spots of barbecue sauce on it from dinner...it smells funny.
Sweetheart: I want you.Would you like to screw me?
Wellhung: OK
Sweetheart: We're in my bedroom.There's soft music playing on the stereo and candles on my dresser and night table.I'm looking up into your eyes, smiling. My hand works its way down to your crotch and begins to fondle your huge, swelling bulge.
Wellhung: I'm gulping, I'm beginning to sweat.
Sweetheart: I'm pulling up your shirt and kissing your chest.
Wellhung: Now I'm unbuttoning your blouse.My hands are trembling.
Sweetheart: I'm moaning softly.
Wellhung: I'm taking hold of your blouse and sliding it off slowly.
Sweetheart: I'm throwing my head back in pleasure.The cool silk slides off my warm skin.I'm rubbing your bulge faster, pulling and rubbing.
Wellhung: My hand suddenly jerks spastically and accidentally rips a hole in your blouse.I'm sorry.
Sweetheart: That's OK, it wasn't really too expensive.
Wellhung: I'll pay for it.
Sweetheart: Don't worry about it.I'm wearing a lacy black bra. My soft breasts are rising and falling, as I breath harder and harder.
Wellhung: I'm fumbling with the clasp on your bra.I think it's stuck. Do you have any scissors?
Sweetheart: I take your hand and kiss it softly.I'm reaching back undoing the clasp. The bra slides off my body. The air caresses my breasts. My nipples are erect for you.
Wellhung: How did you do that? I'm picking up the bra and inspecting the clasp.
Sweetheart: I'm arching my back. Oh baby. I just want to feel your tongue all over me.
Wellhung: I'm dropping the bra. Now I'm licking your, you know, breasts. They're neat!
Sweetheart: I'm running my fingers through your hair. Now I'm nibbling your ear.
Wellhung: I suddenly sneeze. Your breasts are covered with spit and phlegm.
Sweetheart: What?
Wellhung: I'm so sorry. Really.
Sweetheart: I'm wiping your phlegm off my breasts with the remains of my blouse.
Wellhung: I'm taking the sopping wet blouse from you. I drop it with a plop.
Sweetheart: OK. I'm pulling your sweat pants down and rubbing your hard tool.
Wellhung: I'm screaming like a woman. Your hands are cold! Yeeee!
Sweetheart: I'm pulling up my miniskirt. Take off my panties.
Wellhung: I'm pulling off your panties. My tongue is going all over, in and out nibbling on you...umm... wait a minute.
Sweetheart: What's the matter?
Wellhung: I've got a pubic hair caught in my throat. I'm choking.
Sweetheart: Are you OK?
Wellhung: I'm having a coughing fit. I'm turning all red.
Sweetheart: Can I help?
Wellhung: I'm running to the kitchen, choking wildly. I'm fumbling through the cabinets, looking for a cup. Where do you keep your cups?
Sweetheart: In the cabinet to the right of the sink.
Wellhung: I'm drinking a cup of water. There, that's better.
Sweetheart: Come back to me, lover.
Wellhung: I'm washing the cup now.
Sweetheart: I'm on the bed arching for you.
Wellhung: I'm drying the cup. Now I'm putting it back in the cabinet. And now I'm walking back to the bedroom. Wait, it's dark, I'm lost. Where's the bedroom?
Sweetheart: Last door on the left at the end of the hall.
Wellhung: I found it.
Sweetheart: I'm tuggin' off your pants. I'm moaning. I want you so badly.
Wellhung: Me too.
Sweetheart: Your pants are off. I kiss you passionately-our naked bodies pressing each other.
Wellhung: Your face is pushing my glasses into my face. It hurts.
Sweetheart: Why don't you take off your glasses?
Wellhung: OK, but I can't see very well without them. I place the glasses on the night table.
Sweetheart: I'm bending over the bed. Give it to me, baby!
Wellhung: I have to pee. I'm fumbling my way blindly across the room and toward the bathroom.
Sweetheart: Hurry back, lover.
Wellhung: I find the bathroom and it's dark. I'm feeling around for the toilet. I lift the lid.
Sweetheart: I'm waiting eagerly for your return.
Wellhung: I'm done going. I'm feeling around for the flush handle, but I can't find it. Uh-oh!
Sweetheart: What's the matter now?
Wellhung: I've realized that I've peed into your laundry hamper. Sorry again. I'm walking back to the bedroom now, blindly feeling my way.
Sweetheart: Mmm, yes. Come on.
Wellhung: OK, now I'm going to put my...you know ...thing...in your...you know...woman's thing.
Sweetheart: Yes! Do it, baby! Do it!
Wellhung: I'm touching your smooth butt. It feels so nice. I kiss your neck. Umm, I'm having a little trouble here.
Sweetheart: I'm moving my ass back and forth, moaning. I can't stand it another second! Slide in! Screw me now!
Wellhung: I'm flaccid.
Sweetheart: What?
Wellhung: I'm limp. I can't sustain an erection.
Sweetheart: I'm standing up and turning around; an incredulous look on my face.
Wellhung: I'm shrugging with a sad look on my face, my weiner all floppy. I'm going to get my glasses and see what's wrong.
Sweetheart: No, never mind. I'm getting dressed. I'm putting on my underwear. Now I'm putting on my wet nasty blouse.
Wellhung: No wait! Now I'm squinting, trying to find the night table. I'm feeling along the dresser, knocking over cans of hair spray, picture frames and your candles.
Sweetheart: I'm buttoning my blouse. Now I'm putting on my shoes.
Wellhung: I've found my glasses. I'm putting them on. My God! One of our candles fell on the curtain. The curtain is on fire! I'm pointing at it, a shocked look on my face.
Sweetheart: Go to hell. I'm logging off, you loser!
Wellhung: Now the carpet is on fire! Oh noooo!
Sweetheart: <logged off>

[jet frum teh hood]

U GOT TOO MUCH FUCKIN TIME RAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Rattrap]

i love you too.

[L to the mothafuckin S]

rofl xD

[arçAnimal]

bloodninja: Ok baby, we got to hurry, I don't know how long I can keep it ready for you.
j_gurli3: thats ok. ok i'm a japanese schoolgirl, what r u.
bloodninja: A Rhinocerus. Well, hung like one, thats for sure.
j_gurli3: haha, ok lets go.
j_gurli3: i put my hand through ur hair, and kiss u on the neck.
bloodninja: I stomp the ground, and snort, to alert you that you are in my breeding territory.
j_gurli3: haha, ok, u know that turns me on.
j_gurli3: i start unbuttoning ur shirt.
bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't wear shirts.
j_gurli3: No, ur not really a Rhinocerus silly, it's just part of the game.
bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't play games. They f*cking charge your ass.
j_gurli3: stop, cmon be serious.
bloodninja: It doesn't get any more serious than a Rhinocerus about to charge your ass.
bloodninja: I stomp my feet, the dust stirs around my tough skinned feet.
j_gurli3: thats it.
bloodninja: Nostrils flaring, I lower my head. My horn, like some phallic symbol of my potent virility, is the last thing you see as skulls collide and mine remains the victor. You are now a bloody red ragdoll suspended in the air on my mighty horn.
bloodninja: Goddam am I hard now.

[L to the mothafuckin S]

lmfao